Clarissa Returns
For a while now I have been contemplating Clarissa’s story, and where it will lead. My preference would be that it not even continue.
The trouble is that Clarissa wasn’t supposed to have a story to begin with. She was the star of a tasteless, one-off joke that couldn’t possibly be topped. And then Stuffed Friend unearthed a vein of gold hidden inside the premise, and then the goddamn Internet got a hold of Clarissa and started making its demands, and then she got her own page on TvTropes and, well… now I’m stuck with her.
If that sounds disrespectful, believe me: Clarissa wishes she was rid of me as well. But here we are: a critical mass of people want to find out how Clarissa’s story ends, heedless of the fact that it could well end in a far worse place than poor Clarissa already finds herself.
And so, as they say, “once more unto the breech.” But if I am going to toss Clarissa into the grief blender yet again, the least she is owed is the promise that I will set the damn thing on purée and let it run.
I’ve had new characters, scenes and moments bouncing around in my head for years now, but no coherent thoughts on what they all add up to. It will only be as I sit to write the story that they will, hopefully, fall into their natural slots. The interesting thing I’ve found about writing is that if the story is good, you do not so much write it as un-write it; slowing the tornado of your mind and letting the parts settle where they will, like bricks building a house on their own, with me there only to trowel on the mortar.
Part of what has delayed my progress on continuing the story is trying to figure out what to do with the rest of Clarissa’s family– her mother and two brothers, who are as much he victims of Clarissa’s father as she is. There characters came to life in vivid detail for me in Family Portrait, and I have been intimidated at the possibly of having to write the long, time-consuming arcs that their own stories might demand. I would not want to begin exploring their own characters and not finish the job, as I have a tendency to underestimate the burden of the stories I begin. (see Weapon Brown.)
I think I will solve this problem, at least for the interim, by stepping away from Clarissa’s well-established nightmare home life to explore Clarissa’s inner life. You might be surprised to find out that after all these years, I still do not have a clear idea of what Clarissa makes of all that is happening to her. I probably haven’t examined this aspect of her story simply because Clarissa’s circumstances being what they are, I don’t know yet how to give her agency.
As I explore this new territory, I have also been contemplating the terrifying prospect of giving Clarissa… a friend.
This subject is more fraught then you might imagine. The potential for undercutting my own tone and causing the story to take a turn for the cutsey (to say nothing of the “wootsy”) is very real.
Even as I write this, different notions of where such a development could lead are swirling like debris in my tornado brain. But in all that clutter, one idea is still entirely absent, that being probably the most critical thing needed to bring Clarissa’s story to its conclusion: I have absolutely no idea how things will finally play out between Clarissa and her father, especially since having him to freeze to death in a hedge maze (my original idea) was apparently already done in some movie.
All this emotional freight, and I still have to make Clarissa’s story–the topic of which makes a visit to the dentist seem like a weekend at Disney World in comparison–somehow funny. Can you blame me for dragging my feet?
Well, even dragging feet will make progress if they drag long enough. In October, Clarissa’s next chapter begins whether or not either of us wants it to. Hopefully someone does.
“How long do you think it’ll take us to get to Carneilhan?”
For the first time Julie saw her brother make a gesture of uncertainty. He raised his arms and let them drop.
“Three weeks… three months… all our lives…”
Ah, Jason, sometimes Colette is useful, although not very often. I guess you’ll have to figure out Clarissa without me and Sidonie-Gabrielle. Your “Clarissa” makes me cringe, and yet I still read it even when it slides a blade over nerves I didn’t know I had. I hope you find a way forward with her; she’s become an opera, if not an epic.
Cool, I’ll look forward to that!
Good luck!
The curse of an interesting character; they take on their own lives ! Seems to be a talent of yours as I recall Chuck “Weapon” Brown was also supposed to have a short lifespan. Being a child, Clarissa has a long story to tell.
Reminds me of when one of my friends grew attached to a character in one of my short stories, a sentient gryphon. He said I should keep up its story to the end. I pointed out this particular character’s lifespan is 1200-1400 years so we won’t be around for the end of its story !
About time. Jk.
I actually looked this up again a couple days ago and I just thought I would never see the end of this. Take your time to make her story as good as only you can.
I’m both super excited and horrified at her story continuing. I have built up in my head a perfectly happy ending: Clarissa’s Mom finally gets her head out of her butt, and escapes with the children to a happy farm in Kentucky. There, they seek out therapy and report the scumbag dad to the authorities. He is currently getting the poop kicked out of him in some federal prison each night and Clarissa and her family are beginning to heal.
However, since an estimated 80% of sex crimes go unreported and therefore unpunished, I doubt that will happen, but I hope it turns out okay.
I’m looking forward to having my bubble burst.
JY: Your suggestions have been noted. Of course, most people want to see Clarissa murderize her father. Do you think Clarissa could handle the kick of a minigun? Because if she could….
Clarissa was the only reason I signed up for the list. I eagerly await a deeply involved story.
I’m really excited for this! It’s rare to find comics written like Clarissa’s that handle a subject as dark as child sexual abuse without censoring the harsh reality of it’s impact, I thank you for the raw nature of how you’ve written the characters in this. I am sorry that at this pojnt you feel stuck into finishing this story in large due to the reaction of many on the internet, but I want you to know how grateful I am that you’re deciding to continue and hopefully find a fitting end soneday to Clarissa’s story. I think there is something very theraputic sonetimes, in reading the raw nature of characters struggle with a dark subject (whether fiction or non fiction) similar to listening to sad music when feeling sad except on a much greater scale. I wish I could deacribe it better but that’s the best anology I can think of at the moment. Thank you for the various works you’ve given us, and don’t forget to take care of yourself. I’d rather you feel you’re where you need to be rather than have the vast pressure of the internet back you in a corner.
JY: Thanks, Mystie! Maybe I shouldn’t paint the picture as dire as I have. Clarissa is a challenge to write in both the bad and good senses of the term. I just wish I didn’t have so many projects competing with her story!
The dreaded “turn for the cutsie” has sadly, already happened. The school/picture drawing story in Peek was WAY too demure, lacking the half cleaned toilet bowl feel that is Clarissa.
**IN MY OPINION**
I (gasp) feared you were running out of doable material. I mean, how can one publish jocular humor about the realities of pedophilia and yet remain free of persecution? In one word protection: you get cutsey. Maybe lighten up the subject, maybe show two dogs fuk’n and hope people get the vague coincidental jest.
Well I for one am delighted by your plan to drill deeply into Clarissa’s puckered little mind. Poking around her dainty cranium looking to establish firmer subject relevancy will allow for a more fulfilling thrust into this socially delicate issue. FINALLY you can release all those pent up ideas and flood us with some of that stomach churning stuff you’ve been sitting on.
Danny Weaver, my my…the school/picture was not at all demure. Subtle horror is not the same thing as demure.
Perhaps the most stomach churning scene in all of Clarissa is the breakfast scene. Right up there with “sour pennies”.
She’s forced to eat something she doesn’t want, with warm sticky gooey syrup. It’s too much for her. She can’t handle it.
She can’t help but vomit. Looking up at her dad, she’s scared, embarrassed, in trepidation. He’s disappointed, upset. She knows he expects her to continue.
Defeated, demoralized, and helpless, she tries to keep going. He wants to her to put it back in her mouth, vomit and all. He doesn’t care if it’s too much for her. She knows she has no choice, her fear outweighing her disgust.
Can’t really depict a graphic scene of an adult orally raping a child to the point of making them vomit without ending up on a list, so illustrating the concept with french toast will have to make do.
^Reading above comment makes me realize how many of these awful metaphors fly completely over my head… Perhaps intended, perhaps left open to interpretation, nonetheless heartbreaking. So many layers to juggle to this story does sound incredibly intimidating (how did this comic survive 1999-2020), but drag on dear creative and let the story take its reins and we will be waiting on the other side, sobbing.
I didn’t really read into the Clarissa comics as “humorous” but they did read and look like the Sunday Funnies you would find in newspaper comic strips. If anything, when I started reading the Clarissa comics, it felt a bit “too real” and so I also had to take a break from the webcomic. It reminded me too much of my own traumas.
That being said, I cannot make an overstatement on how much I loved reading these comics, because Finally, I had someone I could relate to. (Don’t tell my family about that though, they’d be PISSED.)
JY: Thanks for the praise!