Columbus, Ohio… the final frontier! It is there that I attended the Small Press and Alternative Comic Expo, colloquially known as “SPACE” (though I prefer “SmPrAlCoEx”. I wish just once someone would consult me before naming their comic show).

The show was lousy with indy comic creators whose work will never be transformed into a highly anticipated Hollywood flop like Dawn of Justice. There were also precious few cosplayers, and thus I left the show only moderately bruised. However, what SPACE lacked in goofy costumes it more than made up for in ME!

Which of these spirited independent creators will be the first to abandon their dreams and pursue an associate’s degree from a dental school? The answer is downstage left.
Here I sit, broken hearted. Bought two tables and only…

(Please excuse me! I have a flatulence issue that makes it hard for me to think up rhymes.)
These are my friends, Tim and Jack. They came with me to Columbus because they are white supremacists who wanted to visit a city named after the first European to deny human rights to the people of the New World. (Look, no one is perfect. You should hear their opinions on transgender bathrooms, though. Very progressive!)
Speaking of racism: although I love the samurai costume, I must frown on the use of black face.
I’m sorry! I had no idea you were rocking a facial tattoo! I thought you were mocking a racial taboo!

(Yay! My rhyming’s back!)

This fellow’s schtick is that he is a viking who has travelled forward through time to become a stranger-in-a-strange-land in the Star Trek universe, where he…

You know what? Please just fucking kill me.

Thanks Lars! Have fun at Dragon-Con!
Here I sit, broken hearted…

(Oh right. I already used that one. Well, now I am broken hearted.)

SPACE was great, and I recommend it for anyone except, once again, cosplayers, who will stick out like a Thor thumb.