Alright ! A strongly worded retort from a rank amateur fan. What could go wrong here ?
– starts piling sandbags…
and… I really shouldn’t be saying this… but… hear me out, ok?
Clearly what is going to spill out of me could be easily profoundly misconstrued, so please cut me a lot of slack and give me the benefit of the doubt even though I am a total stranger about to babble something I on some abstract level do recognize that I know I really, really, shouldn’t (but am going to attempt expressing anyway for reasons I cannot even begin to fathom).
Before I start, let me just say that I have nothing against (women, blacks, Jehova’s witnesses, underage breakfast fetishes), in fact, some of my best friends are (women, blacks, Jehova’s witnesses, underage breakfast fetishes), well, ok, you got me there, I’m not sure whether they would count me as friends, but I always close the door on them in an exceedingly friendly manner with a feeling of vague yearning. Where was I?
Right, I was going to relate something so bizarre and at odds with the communal bonds that brought people together at this place that you are going to be at a loss to decide what they are appalled by the most, to the extent of never speaking to me again, nay, acknowledging my existence: simply my believing this bizarre utterance, or my saying it out loud at a public convention, or really the mindset that would create this situation in the first place?
Is this thing on? What do you mean my time is up?
Applauds, gets more sandbags…
*ducks behind impromptu sandbag bunker* *blocks ears*
Ooh, company. Have these ear plugs, and some beer !
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