» Archive » AZ Penetrates My News Condom!

AZ Penetrates My News Condom!

For weeks now I have managed to deflect information about the world at large as though protected by a Holtzman generator (look it up!). However, news that moves slower than 9 cm per second can still reach me, and against my will I have learned that Harold Ramis has died (making him the second most selfish person preventing a new Ghostbusters movie, after Bill Murray), and that Arizona governor Jan “finger-in-the-face” Brewer just recently vetoed a law to prevent homosexuals from purchasing wedding cakes.

Farewell, sweet Barton Fink.

This is a pretty good track record as far as forced oblivions go. My bubble of ignorance is nearly as impenetrable as the GOP’s. Of course, that force field  is still solid enough to protect a Borg cube, or else how could this legislation have made it as far as the governor’s desk?

Jan has truly proven herself as the biggest Tea Party fraud since the original Boston Tea Party framed a bunch of Indians for their own vandalism (which probably caused the British to slaughter a whole village before the deception was uncovered). After all, This isn’t the first time Jan Brewer has had to veto some modern Nuremberg law that AZ’s Reichstag sent her way, while still claiming she is a  bulwark against Comrade Obama. The irony is that while the GOP pretends to be the party of small, heterosexual business, it is juggernauts like the NFL and Apple that brought her to heel.

Another bit of culture that has slipped through my driftnet is the emergence of a new Facebook holiday called “Throwback Thursdays”. While this has probably been around since 2002, I have only just heard of it today after seeing two mentions of it on on FB. Will this corporate phenomenon become the new Valentine’s Day? Christ, I hope not. I don’t think the Suicide Hotline could deal with me every Thursday!

Anyway, without knowing a goddamn thing about the concept behind this idiotic idea, here is my contribution: the opening credits to the awesomely progressive  80’s cartoon Bionic Six! From it’s multicultural ethos to it’s trumpeting of the “miracle of modern science”, it’s the biggest “fuck you” to Arizona I can think of!

YouTube Preview Image


  1. Renegade

    Jan Brewer is a small-timer (think Palin as mayor of Wasilla, Alaska – pop. 9000) who got in as Arizona Secretary of State, and happened to be first in line to succeed Janet Napolitano when Obama picked her for Homeland Security.

    What I hear, she played along with the Tea Party (finger-wagging, immigrant hating) to win an actual term as Gov, and has been carrying water for the Business wing of the Republican Party ever since. Not the worst politician you’ve ever seen, but she makes Linda McMahon seem charismatic by comparison.

  2. aperson

    You make incredible comics, but your political views are fucking insufferable.

  3. Marlowe

    Yeah, being against bills that legalize discrimination is sooo insufferable.

  4. the leaking pen

    aperson, in case you didnt realize, the pointy haired boss and co are the VILLAINS of this story.

  5. aperson


    That’s not my point- any reasonable person will agree that discrimination is bad. I’m referring to how Jason shits all over the right while ignoring the blatant hypocrisy of the left.

  6. Marlowe

    Oh oh oh. The “Both sides are equally bad”.

    No, no they are not. They may both be turds, but the Democrats are certainly shinier turds. The Democrats are center-right oligarchs with a leftist fringe, while the Republicans have become the party of straight up bigotry and religious fundamentalism.

    The fact is, everything the Democrats do badly, the Republicans do worse, and add their own anti-science, anti-gay, anti-woman, racist. spin to it all.

) Your Reply...