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Jason’s Thousands

At last the moment I have held my breath for has arrived! The money from my Kickstarter  has been deposited in my bank account! I am no longer merely a hypothetical success! The precious numbers have officially teleported from one open browser window to another, and that 1000px journey is the difference between imagination and cold hard cash! Ah, commerce!

More importantly, if I blow all that beautiful green paper on an outrageous vacation to Australia to run naked through the Outback covered in eucalyptus oil while the koalas lick me clean, it will now be fraud instead of my oldest masturbation fantasy!

My life is now like Richard Pryor’s in Brewster’s Millions. I have to spend as much of my loot as I can this month for it to count towards business expenses in 2013 and not caviar money. So,  that means buying T-shirts, sketchbooks, ad space, nipple implants, stickers and magnets as fast as I can! Holy shit!…  I still have to put out a graphic novel too!

You know what? This is just too much responsibility! I’m a hobo at heart! Folks, just… take back your money JUST KIDDING! I’m an artist, not a hedge fund manager ONLY KIDDING! This was a fun experiment, but it’s too much for a simple country cartoonist like me to handle SHUT YOUR HOLE! I WANT TO FEEL A KOALA’S VELVET TOUNGE ON MY NECK!!

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  1. YouKnowWho

    You spelled “tongue” wrong. With all that money, you can afford a decent spell checker.

  2. Marlowe

    Silliness. You’d think you could consider some of that as payment for services rendered. I mean, ffs, you’re delivering a product. It seems silly that all of the kickstarter money would have to go to expenses and none of it to personal compensation. So no, I would not consider it “fraud” if (some) of that money went to your koala fetish…as long as the books are shipped by march :3

  3. roaddragon

    Hey, nothing wrong with takin’ yer business expenditures abroad to generate a wider audience, right? Last time I looked ya had a surplus, and the Aussies would dig the WB series for sure. Ya could likely get the same experience in Los Vegas though.

    Glad I’m not the only one with that scenario in my head.

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